I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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