oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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