Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
