Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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