I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
