Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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