I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.