Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
