the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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