you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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