And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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