Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Randomize
