Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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