Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
