im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
