she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Randomize