Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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