The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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