Texts From Last Night

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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.

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  (843): trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts. http://tfl.nu/p33l
  Replies (17) Good night (668) Bad night (2075)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?

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  (816): Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king? http://tfl.nu/6ro0
  Replies (17) Good night (731) Bad night (3188)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee

  (1-440): View more from Ohio

  please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation

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  (440): I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee (1-440): please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation http://tfl.nu/gydk
  Replies (78) Good night (6625) Bad night (7131)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go

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  (410): There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go http://tfl.nu/lquj
  Replies (1) Good night (2464) Bad night (797)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time

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  (216): i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time http://tfl.nu/lu1w
  Replies (1) Good night (2340) Bad night (859)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."

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  (412): Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers." http://tfl.nu/fu3x
  Replies (11) Good night (1135) Bad night (3192)
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  (714): View more from California

  The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.

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  (714): The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night. http://tfl.nu/euw3
  Replies (16) Good night (737) Bad night (2908)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.

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  (902): I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush. http://tfl.nu/kzf1
  Replies (5) Good night (2350) Bad night (820)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....

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  (303): As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak..... http://tfl.nu/pe8z
  Replies (1) Good night (1055) Bad night (543)
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  (61): View more from Australia

  You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.

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  (61): You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out. http://tfl.nu/yu51
  Replies (3) Good night (1138) Bad night (449)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....

  (1+44): View more from

  The baked potato bra?

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  (+44): I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered.... (1+44): The baked potato bra? http://tfl.nu/bc4d
  Replies (4) Good night (674) Bad night (890)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...

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  (+44): I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt... http://tfl.nu/1ly3
  Replies (1) Good night (720) Bad night (648)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.

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  (207): I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there. http://tfl.nu/iapv
  Replies (5) Good night (1329) Bad night (374)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud

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  (262): Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud http://tfl.nu/uu9v
  Replies (1) Good night (422) Bad night (229)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress

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  (989): I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress http://tfl.nu/pd3l
  Replies (1) Good night (507) Bad night (175)

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