i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
