this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
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Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
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It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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