I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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