he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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