You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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