I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
