Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
