Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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