I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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