I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
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