tell your sister to shave her snatch
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
she smelled like a LAN party
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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