whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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