A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
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That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
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Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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