Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
