marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
We're like a lot better than the average bears
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
