Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize