I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
