these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
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