Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
