I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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