Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
