Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
