yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
