used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
