this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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