Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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