sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
