puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
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