This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
