She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
