so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
